Will Smith's slap was an act of pride. Not protection, and not love
Will Smith didn’t slap Chris Rock for a joke at Jada’s expense. He slapped the Everyman for a decade of jokes at his expense.
1 Corinthians 13: 4-8: Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil, but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.
Before they were fighting words, they were funny words.
Before Will Smith realized he was laughing at his wife, Jada Pinkett Smith, he was laughing with her. Or so he thought. Along with everybody else at the Oscars, and millions of people watching at home.
We were all in on the joke, but Jada wasn’t.
Some time between Will’s wide smile and the slap seen ‘round the world, this had to have been communicated to Will. And then it was time to defend honor. And then Will Smith slapped comedian Chris Rock, who he has known for decades.
It was not Jada’s honor Will defended. I see women on Twitter mistaking this as that, perhaps heartened that in 2022 there is a man who would “defend his wife” in such a way.
Nice thought, but we all saw Will laugh. We were all witnesses. For all the talk of Jada’s alopecia, Will’s auto-response was laughter, not violence.
No, violence was his prideful response. Pride at being on the wrong side of the laughter. But also anger at being the butt of the joke for many decades now. You look at Will Smith and see a success, by every measure. Looks, charm, bank — his kids are even making bank.
But it’s not enough. It hasn’t filled him up. Lauryn Hill asked, “How you gon’ win, when you ain’t right within?” Will Smith is Exhibit A proof that you cannot. When you see Will Smith these days, tears are never far from his eyes. There are garbagemen who go to work joyfully. How you gon’ win?
Will Smith’s journey to becoming Big Willie was rooted in hurt. He was cheated on as a young man and decided, in response, that he would become the biggest movie star on Earth.
For a long time, he was. Mission accomplished. And what does he have to show for it?
“Cuck” was a trending topic Monday morning on Twitter. “Entanglement” was nearly Word of the Year in 2020, after Jada put Will through a humiliation ritual at the red table.
The media tried to spin it as business savvy, Girlboss 4D chess. Your lying eyes knew the real truth. Will’s red eyes told the truth.
1 Corinthians 13: 1-3: If I speak in the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I am only a resounding gong or a clanging cymbal. If I have the gift of prophecy and can fathom all mysteries and knowledge, and if I have a faith that can move mountains, but have not love, I am nothing. If I give all I possess to the poor and surrender my body to the flames, but have not love, I am nothing.
Being alone is “not good” for a man, so we are told in Genesis 2:18. After the woman he had his first child with, Will took up with Jada, and they’ve been together for a quarter of a century.
At times, Will and Jada were portrayed as a picture-in-the-dictionary example of enduring black love.
Now they are a cautionary tale, wine turned to vinegar.
For decades now, Will Smith, a success by every measure, has been fighting the ghost of Tupac Shakur. Shakur was killed in 1996. He lived just long enough to become the love of Jada’s life.
Will is alive and Tupac is not. But Tupac was live in a way Will can never match. That slap was Carlton acting out after listening to a Tupac CD, not a patriarch protecting home and hearth.
That rivalry took human form when Jada was publicly linked with August Alsina, a friend of the son named for her, Jaden. (Their daughter is named Willow, after Will. It’s a modern-day take on passing down a name, like if I named a daughter Jamie.)
Now it was not a ghost on Jada’s mind, but a real dude with a real Instagram page. All the movie stardom in the world, and Will Smith was back to square one.
In cheating relationships, partners lie to each other. In cuckold relationships, they lie to themselves.
Will Smith’s tears are the dam breaking. All that silver and gold. But has he ever known true love? True joy? Peace? Forget about Jada for a second. Does Will even love himself?
Will Smith didn’t slap Chris Rock for a joke at Jada’s expense.
He was slapping the Everyman, Adam, for the decade of jokes at his expense.